Category: The Family Front

21 Jan

The Party Monster

Written by UrbanVox 0 Comments

Sometimes I worry I am starting to get old.. Okay… maybe not sometimes… maybe it is most of the time but that is beside the point… You know what I mean and all that. Once you have kids and they start having a social life that is much more agitated than yours you know you are on the way to your demise…

I mean… not so long ago (over 10 years ago… eeek) I used to be the one that would go out on a Friday Night to go clubbing and not come back home until at least Sunday afternoon after party hopping with some of my best friends. The stuff of my regular points knew me by name it was that bad… Live hard… party harder… and all that. (ROFL)

Hardcore huh?!?! As if… My circle of friends was quite healthy on the things we used to do to have fun… We might have ended up in a beach 800Km from home once but that is beside the point… I am not here to talk about me… I am here to talk about the Big Monkey today.

And Yesterday was SCHOOL DISCO NIGHT!!!

He has been so very excited about that all week long. I had to laugh hard when I picked Lil One out of the childminders and she told me how relieved he was when she confirmed to him (twice) that this weekend was not a daddy weekend because he sooooo wanted to go and was at night etc etc… :-)

School Disco is a serious point. It involves loads of prepping and  practising of dance moves (And he told me when I picked him up that he “busted all his moves”.  And we got a first view of them before I went out to drop him off at the school gate (I wasn’t allowed to get out of the car this time… As if I was going to embarrass him or anything like that… the cheek!!!!)

 And of course… there are the outfits… Which this time around he wasn’t too sure he had the perfect one because, and that is VERY important and relevant: His mum chose it for him. (OUTRAGE!!!)

He wanted to go to the disco wearing a waistcoat, a “Michael Jackson style” hat, fingerless gloves and sun glasses… ROFL!!!! I think I kinda see why Vic vetoed the outfit… I blame it on all the hours we’ve let him watch MTV in his baby chair when he was a baby… What??? We were in Brazil, and Vic missed home, and for a while that was the only TV channel in we had in English… hehehe…

My big boy is growing up… And way too quick as well! I was pondering on that and feeling happy that the other ones will still be a while until the other two start giving their first steps on the having an actual independent and agitated social life until I see THAT crossing in front of the camera to join his brother as he demonstrated his latest dance moves…

Yeah… I forgot Little One already HAS his own amazing little moves… Much like his big brother… He made us laugh sooooo much!! God… I just love those little moments! Gotta enjoy them as much as I can while they last… The are rare and VERY precious these days… I truly wish they could last forever…

…and in a way they will… in my mind… and in my heart…

05 Nov

The Birds, The Bees and The Bow Cheeky Bow Wow

Written by UrbanVox 17 Comments

So… you know that dreaded moment in the life of a parent when he/she has to have that little chat with the kiddo and explain certain truths of life… Little things like “if kids come from mum’s belly how did they GET in there?”… For THAT I would be prepared… hell… I even had the discurse rehearsed in my head (I wanna be a cool daddy… so I decided I would never lie to the kiddos in things ) but NOTHING could have prepared me for what happened…

You see… The Big Monkey is quite internet savvy… So I have blocked access to a variety of websites from the one computer he has full access to while he is with me. So when he went to one of his usual sites to play online games/watch zombie animations (yeah… he likes zombies right now…) I didn’t pay much attention and went to the kitchen to get biscuits with Little Monkey leaving him to his own devices.

When I came back I noticed him laughing to what looked like a Ben 10 Character so I went to see what he was laughing about… My heart skipped a beat, my jaw fell and I was speechless for what seemed like an eternity (it was about 5 seconds… but still…) He was watching Ben 10 indeed… but the girlie was fighting a monster with 3 snake like cocks and they were… well… I don’t really need to describe the whole scene, do I?

The monkey had accidentally discovered Hentai… And he thought it was funny… Erm…

After telling him to close it (I think he kinda noticed the urgency of it when I told him because he looked kinda startled… and he shut the whole window… he never does that… he usually shuts only tabs…) I texted his mum asking her if she wanted me to wait til I delivered him tomorrow so we could all sit and have a chat or if I should just go agead and do the talk of the birds and the bees myself… Her answer was simple : You said you’d do the talks!! See, if we’d had girls instead…”

Yeah…  Not a lot of help… But hey… I gave my word… I’d do the boy talks… she’d do girl talks (Shame we only had boys really… damn…).

Now… it is kinda hard to know how to start the Birds and Bees chat if no one ever had it with you… Yeah… I’ve learned with books and chats to friends… AND the World Wide Web (which was a lot smaller when I was 15). So… we had our little chat… was a lot les awkward than I thought it would be… Guess it pays to simply being open and not bullshit around with metaphors etc… Mind you… not THAT open… There is still time for that and let the child be a child, right?!!?!? I think I’ve covered the basics… I’m sure I had told him most of it before anyway (Monkey is too damn curious!!!) And I have answered most of the questions he had…and promised to answer SOME of the other ones when he is older… Then we went on to play “Fight for the Ball” Our own little version of rugby… but prison rules apply… Nothing like a little of rough and tumble to take yer mind out of awkward things, right?! :-)

Quick question… Have you ever thought on how you will do it when yo HAVE to do it? And if you have already had that chat… how was it?!?!? I’d REALLY love to know to be honest… just to make sure I didn’t make too much of a fool out of myself… LOL!

Okay… I think I’ve rambled enough for today… just got one more thing to pick on… WHO THE HELL INVENTED THE TERM BIRDS & THE BEES?!?!?! I mean… lets analyse that… Does it make any sense?!?!? Is like, you are using a metaphor trying to not give too much info to your kid… and at the same time you are telling your child that is OK to have loads of sexual partners… I mean… is that what birds and bees have in common isn’t it?!?! The “visit loads of flowers and polinize each of them”… Bit of a conundrum, no?!?!?!

I vote for changing the name of the term from “The Birds & The Bees” for “Bow Cheeky Bow Wow”…

Who’s with me?!?!?!

26 Jul

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Written by UrbanVox 13 Comments

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24 Jul

Tomorrow

Written by UrbanVox 6 Comments

Tomorrow is the big day…

I’ve been through it twice before… but that doesn’t make me any less nervous…

Butterflies are running rampage in my belly and I simply can’t think about anything else, and the arrival of my third boy has been populating my mind for the past few days in special.

Not all thoughts were happy… I have cried once or twice because JT will be another of my sons that I won’t get to see growing on an every day basis. I want to be as present as I can… I need to be as present as I can, but in the end I realise that it’s not the same as being there every day. But I am happy I will finally be able to actually be part of JT’s life. His mum carried him for the past 9 months and I might have not had much say or chance to participate on the pregnancy, but tomorrow is a new day, and the beginning of a new walk. And in this new walk I have the chance to be part of his little life.

We’ve spoken better about the details of tomorrow… I am still not allowed to be there for the C-Sec as there might be complications and to be honest, I don’t want to add up to Hales’s stress at that moment, but I’ll be impatiently waiting at the hospital’s cafe for news coming from her mum or the midwifes. I will be impatiently waiting to know when I can go up to see my littlest monkey (I’m sure he will be one… all of his brothers are… hehehehe).

I am curious to see his little face…  and hold his little hands on mine… And for that little moment I know I will forget the world out there, and forget every single doubt and pain I have. Every worry and every fear… gone.

Sure, new ones will come… they are bound to come… That’s what kids are for aren’t they? so we can worry about them? :)

Right now to me all that matters is that I will be able to hold him in my arms… That’s enough for me

So tomorrow… If you need me… I’ll be having coffee at the hospital’s cafe… and I’ll be waiting to be called up to see the littlest monkey. :)

And yeah… I’ll be tweeting… :-)

Tomorrow! :)

28 Jun

4 Weeks to go…

Written by UrbanVox 6 Comments

Dear JellyTot

Just four weeks until you are here and I can finally cradle you in my arms and look at your little face… hold your tiny hands… and if I know myself, cry like a girl when it finally sinks in that you are here and I am holding you.

I feel a bit unprepared… I was there throughout the pregnancy and birth of 2 of your brothers… I felt just the same with them even though I read once and twice every single book on the subject. With your Bigger Brother I thought I was going to be the worst dad ever… I didn’t even like kids before I found out he was on the way… That of course changed like water to wine when he finally popped out (literally) on the way to daddy’s best friend’s Birthday BBQ. I was there… And I was ready for anything… And have been there every since… at least as much as I can.

With A I thought I was a bit more prepared… I read the books again just in case, spoke to him every day over the belly as I did with TB, did the pre-natal class to refresh and was even the 1st to hold him as he came out… Hell if it wasn’t for 4 minutes I would have had to deliver him myself according to the Midwife… And I thought I’d be totally capable of doing it. Although I thought I had forgotten every little thing I was surprised to see how easy it came back to me.

I haven’t been able to be so present all the while you are in there growing and getting ready to come out, not by my own choice mind you… But I remember every second of the two scans I sat through looking at you moving and waving… listening to your heartbeat. I remember when your mum told me over the phone that you are a boy… I was shocked at first as I thought and was really happy with the possibility of you being a little girl… but then news settled and I was just as happy if not happier that you are a healthy little boy.

Things have not been easy from them on… Me and your mummy going our separate ways hasn’t made things any easier as well as I now have  limited access to news about you. Other reason why I can’t wait to have you is that I will finally be able to “be your dad” when you are out. I haven’t had a chance to be there as much as I wanted so far but you can be sure that I will always be there from the moment you see me. nothing or no one will get on my way to be right there for you and I am simply stopping at nothing to make sure of it.

I wonder sometimes where things went wrong  and I really can’t find a solution to that question.

But life goes on my son, and don’t let anyone tell you the contrary. Change is the only thing that will always be a constant in life and we need it to be able to develop. Don’t stop to “think about the spilled milk”. Live life as best as you can and do not regret making mistakes. At the end of it you will regret more the things you never took a chance at than the ones you did. Many of them will be wrong choices, but wonderful things can come from such decisions too. You are living proof of that.

And other thing… People will talk… always… but my grandma used to say something that I still keep with me as a major rule: Listen to it all, if it serves you keep it… if it doesn’t bin it. In the end what matters are the decisions you take in life and no matter what they are, I need you to know one thing: I will always be there for you. I can’t promise I will support and/or approve  every single one of them… But one thing is for sure, I will be right there behind you til the day that I die.

Just four weeks til you are out here with us… I know it’s just a few days but it feels like an eternity when you’ve been counting the seconds like I have been doing. We are all waiting for you out here and can barely wait for D Day.

One last thing… it is a simple one that people tend to not give to much importance nowadays… A phrase that seems to be thrown to the winds way too much for people that don’t really mean it… A feeling that is the best you will ever feel but at the same time the most painful: I LOVE YOU MY SON. Always have from the moment you found out you were on board and I will to the moment I close my eyes for the last time.

Don’t forget it…

Daddy

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