Posts Tagged ‘Crap’

I just came back from the DSA!

It is official… today is not my day!! Let me retell the saga so far and you will know why…

• 2:30am - I Finish editing yesterday’s V-Log (so… any idea for the name yet?) and uploading it to YouTube and go to bed only to find a naked TB sleeping on my side of the bed because his was wet. After trying to enlist Vic to help, I get the best job (as always): take care of his bed while she supervises him getting dressed in new pajamas. All done I undress myself and go to bed… 3am (I am rubish changing duvet covers…)

• 4am – For 200 different reasons at the same time although one of the being the biggest one… not gonna mention it now tho… I is shy… I am rolling from one side to the other and can’t sleep.

• Circa 4:45am I fall asleep

• Circa 6:30am I am awake again as Vic leaves the bed. by the time I fall asleep again it is

• 7am – and I have to get the TB ready for school… Come Back from there with Alana’s grandma talking like a parrot all the way from school till home (apparently she’s going back to Brazil tomorrow and had to go out and buy new suitcases… and spent about 15 minute waking and going on on the same subject…

• 10am – I get a phone call asking me why I didn’t go to the Artisan Networking meeting… Apparently I had missed the chance to meet someone that would probably mean a £5k contract… (grrrrrr)

• Circa 10:30am – I get a call from Spain from a prospect client that wants to pay less for his website… After spending 20 minutes on the phone trying to explain to him that I can’t lower the price more than I already had to do prepare a CMS the Way he wanted and why he retreats saying that he’ll have to discuss it with his council again and would be getting back to me before the end of the week (yeah right…)

• 11:02am – I post this morning’s post (which I wrote last night and saved as a draft instead of publishing) and run out of the door to take my DSA test. GPS and Google Maps tell me I would take 20 minutes to get there.

• 11:43am – I am right at the corner of where I was supposed to take the test. Because the GPS didn;t recognise the address or post code of the building I stop woman and ask her for directions. she says “Ah… the DSA? You are on the wrong end of the road” (explains me the route I have to take around a one way system so full of curves that the GPS literally crashed taking me around the town-center of Kingston and back to where I was where I discover that if I had only made a U turn and turned right I will be inside the car park and in time for my test. NO SUCH LUCK!) It took me 15 minutes to go around the the the damn woman sent me and enter the car park to find a parking space (the car park is right beside the DSA building).

AND YOU ASK WHY MEN NEVER STOP FOR DIRECTIONS!!! Last time I ask a woman for it!That’s for sure! (sorry girls, me is VERY mad ATM)…

• 12pm (Sharp) - After parking the car on the 12th floor of the car park I RUN to the DVA’s testing centre.

• Circa 12:05pm – I am told I am late and therefor I can;t take the test today. Am given a number to call and try to cancel/re-schedule my test for another day.

• 12:24Pm – I am back to the car imputing Mum’s address in kent into the GPS so I can go and check her post/bring a couple of boxes for storage… when I notice my rucksack (and with it her keys) was left at home on the hurry to leave the house to get to the DSA in time. So on my way back home…

• 12:26pm - Vic Calls me VERY mad because I missed the test and spent money unwisely etc etc etc, tells me 200 reasons why I stink etc etc etc… and hangs up on my face (wait… who booked the test for the week before we’re traveling knowing that I would be trying double hard to make some money as I intend to REST during the trip to Scotland?) Ok that might be the PMT talking but “£$$^$%^£$%^”£!

• 2pm – I get home and decide that there is NO WAY I’ll make it to Kent and back today in time to get the TB back from After School Club Thing. I call Pearson Vue to try to re-arrange the test and they say I am not in the system yet, and if I were I wouldn’t be able to book the test today… useless!!!

Just opened a letter from British Gas saying that the Direct Debit failed!!! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!

What’s wrong with today??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

This has been the most deplorable day of the year… And I’ve had quite a bumpy ride so far! And it is not even a Monday so I can blame it on the day… (Can’t wait for 2008 to be over, really…)

Worse of all… it is only 2:46pm… I wanna go to bed and not getting up till today is GONE!

Crap!

I have come to a sudden realization…

I have had the knife and the butter in my hand for longer than I thought…

… And what have I done with my life???? What happened to that got-get-it guy that had that huge prospect for success… that knew how to maximize potential… The one that knew how to take money out of thin air?

Why is it that I can make rivers of money to other people but make only enough when am flying solo???

I have devised a (yet another) Masterplan… well it is one that currently goes with what I live at the moment… it is an adaptation to the grand original… It will not make us rich but it will open doors… Not that I really want to be rich… I have had money in my life… and it didn’t do me any good… didn’t do bad… but definitely no good came from it…

The plan is plausible… it is not a novelty but it proved to work once and again… Then why am I so afraid!!!! I’ve got all the technicalities covered… got all the background checked… it is doable… flight worthy… why am I afraid to take off? Is it that I am afraid of falling on my face again????

I’ve been rethinking my life… I hate the fact that I have had time to do it… Some things need to change… and I have set time and date for this change to happen! I think it is time to STOP thinking of others and thinking about myself a bit… What good does it make to spend a life trying to help people that doesn’t want to help themselves??? Is it an utopia to think that you can get people together to make a difference?

Once upon a time I thought I could do it… today… I have my doubts…

Sorry for throwing that at you like that… I needed to take it of the chest… I’ll probably still be stubborn and keep trailing the hopeless steps… but I’ll do it in a more balanced scale… I have seen first hand that devoting full time to a dream (specially when the dream depends on too many people transforming the way they think) can be a toll too hard to pay… and the cost might end up being my sanity…

I still haven’t found what I’m looking for… And I surely haven’t seen the end of it.

But I’ll sure let u know when I do…

This post didn’t end up telling what I wanted to say (at all!!)… and it sure came a LOT more straight from the heart than I intended… but in the near future (when things are finally taking off) I’ll make the announcement I was meant to make today!I’ve come to this realization somewhere between the first word and the middle of the post!

I’ve got to define some things before I do it…

but stay tunned as I promise I’ll blog the whole journey!!!

zya!

I have tried to install Firefox 3 on the computer (release supposed to be today)…

But the bloody thing doesn’t like my computer as it seems… now I can;t open it… I can’t access my bookmarks and am starting to get furious with that thing… arrrrrghhhhh!!!!

If you are a Firefox Developer PLEASE don;t cross my way today!

Off to the HUB!

zya!